a silhouette of myself in my life-long pursuit to know me and how I relate to others so that God in my life will be glorified...

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

My Words of Remembrance of our Dear Mother

(The following are the Words of Remembrance I spoke about my mother during the funeral service held at the Blacktown Adventist Church last 13 June 2013.  I was terribly sad and upset about her death that I had to write this.  Usually, I can deliver extemporaneous speeches, but not at this moment when I lost my dear mother---my friend, my best friend. Thanks to my niece Ruth Pearl Custodio for this photo)

There wasn’t anything my mother did not and wouldn't for me and my siblings. By the same token, there isn’t anything in the world I would  not do for her.  This, (speaking before you in this circumstance), however is really hard for me to do. How do I remember my mother?  Let me count in many ways.

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My mother loved hats.  In all our life together here in Australia, the big issue was where to house her tons of hats.  She had different hats for each season.  The one I am wearing now is her most loved ‘hat.’ That’s why I had always made sure this ‘hat’ could readily be found.



My mother loved flowers. Back in the Philippines, she grew roses and orchids. Here she grew roses, chrysanthemums, and a range of houseplants.  She also grew vegetables.





My mother also loved music and songs.  She enjoyed listening to Philippine classical music called Kundiman. She liked the late Philippine soprano called Sylvia la Torre. She also liked Andrea Bocelli particularly his DVD called Under the Desert Sky. 


She had a great singing voice in her youth that she often did a duet item in the Seventh Day Adventist church she went to with a young man who eventually became my father.

A few months ago, after she came back from Merle’s house, I asked her in a joking tone ‘Mum, Merle told me you were singing a song to her. ..How is it you don’t sing a song for me?’ Straightaway, Mum stopped  while we were walking in the hallway… straightened up her crooked body and sang out loud…Besame mucho…’




My mother was creative.  With her sewing machine skills, she made beautiful clothes for my siblings and me. She could even turn remnant fabrics into beautiful tops, and also into beautiful and useful household things.  She was also good designer. I remember when I was an IAEA fellow in University of Florida when two American women stopped and one of them remarked, Oh what beautiful dress!.  Where did you buy it?” I did not buy it my mother made it.  She also made costumes in all the drama presentations in my Christian ministry in a different church in early 1990s

My mother also worked like a jet.  When she had a house here, it amazed me how she was able to put curtains on all the windows of her house and even made chair and footstool covers--all just in a day.  When I bought my own house, I had wished to myself I had my mother’s skills.


My mother was a hardworking person.  In her great desire to fulfil her high ambitions for all of us, she engaged in one business after another to help my father support our big family, to build a bigger house and send us all of us to university.  She first ran a cottage industry by employing lived-in machinists to make Ready To Wear clothing which she delivered to a few outlets in the big, busy market place called Divisoria.  She managed two grocery stores in a supermarket in Caloocan City.  At the same time, she also managed a sari-sari mixed store near our house. She also ran a boutique shop in the then newly established Manila Shopping Centre and engaged in recycling business.  She also built dwellings to rent out accommodation to people from nearby and faraway provinces who wanted to eventually settle in Manila.



My mother was a loving and understanding mother.  Unlike my father who dealt with us with the rod, my mother disciplined us using the Word of God to correct us from our wrongdoings.  I believed these two methods of discipline complemented that I could confidently say that all of my siblings and I had grown up well.

My mother was kind, generous and charitable.  I remember all the stormy days when she opened our house to our tenants and even prepared for them hot soup and shared with them biscuits  from our humongous tin of biscuits which she stocked at home.  I remember also that time when our finances were tight and she gave away her last money to the young pastor who visited us.   When I asked in protest why, she said the pastor needed to put food on the table for his wife and his four young children.


Yes, I remember my mother in countless ways, which could make a big book.  But, most of all, I remember
my mother for her big and unwavering faithfulness to a great God whom she talked endlessly.


I could never forget in my youth each sunrise when she kneeled in prayer and each sunset when she led my siblings and I to kneel in prayer to God thanking Him for providing us with our daily bread, asking Him to protect my father who usually worked on night shifts, asking God to protect us from all evils, from sudden death or any natural calamities and also asking God to forgive us from all our sins.


I saw before my eyes God’s great faithfulness to her.  When a really big typhoon hit Manila which was commonly referred by adults in our neighbourhood as Viente ocho de Mayo, 28th of May in the 1960s, she led my fearful siblings and I who were watching the flood waters rise by the hour to a prayer of faith.  She told us God was merciful and He would not allow our small house then which was similar to a typical Queensland house built on stilts to be carried away in the flood waters, just like those ones  my father watched pass by while he stood by our house which he already tied to the big trees in our yard even before there was flooding.  The rain stopped just a ruler height before the flood waters reached the floor of our house.




For a number of years, my mother and went to this church until her mobility decreased. Nevertheless, she continued to worship God.  I saw her read her Bible.  I heard her sing hymns at anytime during the day or night.  As she was old and frail and could not kneel anymore, I found her praying while sitting down. When she reached her ripe age and found it hard to sit up for a long time in bed, I found her praying while lying down early in the morning, ie because she would not respond to me until she finished praying.


She once told me, No she could not do things for us the ways she used to, but she never stopped praying for us.

When cataract hit her eyes, I read the Bible to her.  I sang hymns to her which she sang along with me, and also hymns which she could not sing by heart.  When her vision became better after two cataract surgery, then we worshipped God together.


My mother loved Psalm 91.  She knew by heart v. 16 in the vernacular...at bubusugin ko siya ng mahabang buhay at ipakikita ko sa kanya ang aking pagliligtas...

Yes, God had been true to His words.  He   would never lie. Through all my mother’s trials, she came out strong.  She pulled through when she had a triple bypass surgery in 1996, left mastectomy in early 2000, heart failure in 2009 and then aspiration pneumonia in 2012.  This did not happen during her recent hospitalisation when she had a minor stroke. The complication associated with diabetes, the atrial fibrillation, high cholesterol and blood pressure took its toll. God had called her to rest. She died in her sleep. Through all the trials and afflictions she had gone through, God had beautified my mother.  It amazed me how people who don’t even know her while she was still alive over the years said how beautiful and cute she was, even the paramedic who came during her last hospitalisation said how cute she was even while she was doing those involuntary jerky moments as a result of stroke. I had been encouraged when she was in the hospital how some kitchen, nursing and general services staff came by to say hello to her or just to see how she was going.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-KcCm_8U1oA


My mother honoured God all her life, and God honoured her.  I believed it was God’s plan to send Pastor Daniel whom my brothers and sisters and I have never met to go the hospital to visit our mother.  Just like the good kings in the Bible who had a proper funeral, my mother deserved to have her funeral service to be conducted in a Seventh Day Adventist Church which had remained close to her heart despite her not being able to attend the church for a number of years.




My mother could not see what was going on here.  She could not hear what I am saying.  But her life has been a living letter which we, my siblings and I have been reading over the years.  The Lord planned it this way to serve as a final testimony of my mother's life as she took her last journey on this earth.

My siblings and I and the rest of our extended family praise God for her life.  God has been good to her. Glory be to God.